What Good Hands-On Cueing Actually Looks Like

There’s a Pilates influencer who keeps showing up in my feed—Or Kahlon—and frankly, it infuriates me. I’ve seen a lot in my years in the Pilates world, but his videos are some of the most blatantly inappropriate examples of hands-on cueing I’ve ever witnessed. He oversteps the line between helpful and unnecessary, and I frequently find myself asking: What exactly is the point of that touch?

In one video, he’s placing his hand directly on a client’s breast (link). In another, he’s slapping a client’s butt (link) as if that’s somehow a legitimate cue. These aren’t isolated incidents—they’re part of a pattern that feels straight out of the old creepy fitness guru playbook. You know the one: charismatic male instructor, overly tactile under the guise of “helping,” using touch more as theater than teaching.

And yet, Or’s popularity keeps rising. He recently landed the cover of Pilates Journal, celebrated for his fluid and often mesmerizing movement on a reformer. And I get it—he’s captivating to watch. But his teaching? It’s appalling. His approach reflects a larger issue in the fitness world: the glamorization of instructors who prioritize performance over professionalism, sensation over substance.

There’s a long history of male fitness professionals using their position to wield power—often inappropriately—over clients. And we’ve seen the harm that causes. Haven’t we learned enough by now to recognize the red flags? “That’s how Joe was,” is not an acceptable justification. Joseph Pilates lived in a different era, and even then, not everything he did should be gospel today. We’ve learned. 

At least, I hope we have.

So can we please stop elevating instructors who perpetuate this kind of behavior? It’s not effective. It’s not brilliant. It’s gross. And it undermines the legitimacy of the entire Pilates profession.

Let’s Talk About Hands-On Cues

I’m not against hands-on cueing. Far from it. When done well, it can be a powerful tool to enhance body awareness, alignment, and connection. But like any tool, it requires skill, intention, and boundaries.

Here are my personal guidelines for using hands-on cues in a way that is ethical, respectful, and effective.

1. Consent Is Non-Negotiable

You must have explicit consent before using hands-on cues. Even then, consent is not carte blanche to touch whenever and wherever you want. There are boundaries—physical and ethical—and crossing them isn’t just wrong, it can cause a huge break in trust between instructor and client.

2. Verbal cues first, always

Before reaching for a tactile cue, try using verbal instructions and imagery. Great instructors can cue entire classes without laying a single hand on a client. Touch is a cherry on top, not a default.

3. Touch with Purpose

Every hands-on cue should be:

• Precise: Know exactly how and where you’re touching.
  

• Confident: Touch hesitantly and it creates confusion or discomfort.
  

• Brief: Lingering makes everyone uncomfortable and undermines the purpose.

If you don’t have a clear, actionable reason for your touch—don’t do it. 

4. Large group classes are not the time for frequent hands-on correction

In a large group setting, hands-on cues should be used sparingly and strategically. Use them only if:

• The client is in physical danger and needs immediate correction.
  

• The cue is a quick finesse that does not disrupt the flow of class for others.

If a cue requires a long explanation or extended contact, it’s not appropriate for a group setting. It’s okay if a client doesn’t move perfectly. The goal of a group Pilates class is to move, not to achieve surgical precision with every rep.

5. When It Doesn’t Work, Move On

If you deliver a hands-on cue and it doesn’t land, do not linger. Staying in contact longer won’t magically make it more effective—it just makes it awkward and confusing. Move on and find another way to communicate your point.

I’m calling for a higher standard. Not just for the sake of clients, but for the integrity of our profession. Pilates is enjoying the limelight right now, but accepting inappropriate touch will not just hurt those students on the receiving end of it, but damage the reputation and integrity of Pilates as a whole.

Let’s stop pretending that tactile cues are somehow required to be a good teacher. They aren’t. When done poorly, they’re a distraction, a liability, and a disservice to the true heart of Pilates: mindful, intelligent movement rooted in respect—for the body, the person, and the practice.

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